Jacky Sherman

The Consultant's Consultant

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Jacky Sherman

Referral Institute: How To Walk In Another's Shoes

To get lots of referrals ...

Posted on: 23/04/2014   By: Jacky Sherman

You can tell an awful lot about a person from their shoes. However you never really know a person until you stand in their shoes and walk around in them (taken from Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird) ...

"You never really know a man until you stand in his shoes and walk around in them"

"You never really know a man until you stand in his shoes and walk around in them"

Now, people are all unique and we all have our funny little ways, but maybe we're not as unique as we like to think we are? We tend to have a preferred way of behaving that can be categorised by two criteria, that together, make up our usual behavioural style.

"We are either task focused and get things done or people focused where relationships matter more."

We also tend to be fast paced and just get on with things, or more measured, so we like to check out either the task, or the people, before acting.

So this week, I thought I'd look at each of these four types of behaviours and how understanding people with a different style to your own can pay dividends. At the end, I will show you how you can learn more to improve your results when networking.

I will use their choice of shoes as a quick indicator of people's preferred style, then for each style, suggest the value of learning how to walk in their shoes.

  • Fast paced, task focused

    In our training we call them 'Go Getters'. This type of person is bold, decisive and direct. They have a strong desire to win and like to be in charge and in control. They are goal-oriented, with a strong 'Get It Done Now' attitude.

    You can certainly recognise them by their shoes. They will always be leather, smart, highly polished, up to date and the best make and quality they can afford.

    What would they get out of understanding how different people tick? Quite simply, it is the quickest way to get the result they want from the relationship. They will know how to push the other person's buttons.

  • Fast paced, people focused

    We call them 'Promoters'. These people are full of energy, are outgoing and fun-loving. They want to know all about you and who you know in common before doing business with you. They constantly look for connections between people. They have a large social and business network and are very generous in sharing these with others.

    Their shoes? These people tend to go for either high fashion or more casual shoes. Sometimes not as clean as they could be; "I was going to clean my shoes and then got distracted by someone." They may wear conservative shoes for business but their love of bright colours will show up in either their choice of socks, handbag or other accessories.

    For Promoters, stepping into someone else's shoes is fun. Who knows what you might learn? People are just so interesting! For them, understanding others will help to work out the best connections for you both and quickly find out how you can work together.

  • Measured paced, people focused

    These are the 'Nurturers'. They are patient, helpful and understanding. They are great listeners and will want to get to know you well before doing business with you. They are in the relationship for the long term, so once they trust you they are incredibly loyal.

    They choose conservative shoes. These are not showy people so they will be clean, neat and understated.

    Learning a lot about you and how you operate is really important to a Nurturer as it is an essential part of building trust. They need that trust to have the confidence to introduce you to their valued contacts.

  • Measured pace, task focused

    We call these the 'Examiners'. Examiners are effective, efficient and pay attention to the details. They like to develop strategies and follow a systematic process to their business dealings. They research things thoroughly so as to avoid unnecessary risks. These are the people who, when they ask for additional information, will actually read it!

    They buy shoes for the long term so tend to go for conservative styles that do not date quickly. Value for money is more important than fashion.

    Examiners tend to be more interested in what the other person actually does rather than who the person is. That gives them solid grounds for evaluating whether the other person is someone they want to do business with over the long term.

So my tip for this week: learn how to stand in someone else's shoes then relate to them closer to their style if you want to understand them, develop a working relationship and ultimately refer to each other.

If you want to know more about how to do this, then I'm thrilled that Sarah Owen, Master Trainer with the Referral Institute is joining us at Silverstone on 22nd May. She will take you through a fascinating session that will help you get far greater success from your networking by applying this knowledge.

If you're a Go Getter you already know if you want to do this or not. So if you're coming click here to reserve your place.

Promoters ... can I tempt you with a wonderful opportunity to connect with a host of new people and have some fun together whilst learning. Sarah and I are really looking forward to sharing this knowledge with you. Click here to reserve your place

So Nurturers; this workshop will give you the opportunity to listen to others and assess how you can help them in a non-pressured manner. Maybe you'd like to come with a close business friend and learn together how to build trusting relationships with different types of people? You may like to sign-up now, on the other hand you may prefer to talk to me about it first. Click here to send me a message and I'll call you.

And finally, you Examiners out there. This 3 hour workshop will give you a DISC self-assessment to understand your own behavioural style, then it will take you systematically through a series of exercises that will increase your knowledge about the other styles. As well as the research-based knowledge that Sarah will share, you will hear directly from the other participants how they think. Then you can work out the differences and what that means for you when networking. I suspect you need further information before making a decision about whether this is a good use of your time so Click here to send me a message and either ask your questions or request I call you to give you more information on what this workshop can do for you.

For all the Go Getters, Promoters, Nurtures and Examiners, I really do look forward to seeing you at Silverstone on the 22nd of May!

Until next time ...


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